HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BABY! (this ones long!)

this is sort of a special birthday for me... as most know, my pregnancy with Kole was quite difficult. 14 total weeks on bedrest, 6 of those weeks were spent on hospital bedrest. This past month I couldn't help but think to myself on many occasions, 'this time last year...' . My whole time in the hospital, my dr. kept telling me that I just had to make it to 35 weeks. I remember the night before I had Kole... it was a Friday night which were always the nights that Tim spent with me. I told him that I 'knew' I was either going to have Kole that night or the next day... I just felt different. I went to bed contracting that night and woke up at 4am contracting even harder. I beeped the nurse and let her know that I was contracting. Of course, as an antipartum nurse her first instinct is to get the needle out and inject me with some terbutaline to stop the contractions. OHHH NO... NOT THIS DAY... this day I am EXACTLY 35 weeks and she is not going to 'terb me up'... No way! I was determined to finally get over to Labor and Delivery and have this baby! Finally! Well, I made it. About 4 hours after going to L&D I was ready to push. I seriously pushed 3 times and baby Kole was out. I didnt get to hold him long because soon he was wisked off to the NICU where he stayed for 14 days. We were so thrilled when we were able to bring him home. 3 days after he came home from the NICU it was already time for me to go back to work. Luckily, I was able to take him with me. For the first couple weeks, he was a very good, easy baby. He spent most his time sleeping, as do most babies. Then suddenly he started screaming night after night after night and then soon it started to consume our days too. I spent many many nights sleeping in the recliner with Kole. I remember one frustrating night well... Kole had been screaming and not eating all day. I finally broke down and took him to the ER where the dr. basically rushed us out the door saying it was just colic. I knew it wasnt and I was so angry. Finally several weeks later I diagnosed him myself with 'Silent Reflux'. Sure enough thats what it was and after we got him on some meds he was so much better. I actually started to like him a little bit. Kole's had a rough start... not only did he have his reflux issues for the first several months of his life, he also came down with RSV at just 3 months old and spent 2 nights in the hospital. At about 4 months he developed a rice allergy and vomitted day and night until his little body had nothing to give. At 6 months old (Easter morning) he broke his arm and was casted up for several weeks. Ya know... its sad because now that I think about it, the only parts of Kole's early months that I remember are all bad memories. Things have changed now though. He is a totally normal little guy. He may be small for his age but he is happy and healthy. I absolutly LOVE this little boy.

Sunday we celebrated his birthday. He had 2 parties! We had a party in the morning with coffee, chocolate milk and donuts and then a party in the afternoon with cake & a pinata. Today is his actual birthday. I am not watching any kids today so it's just me, Allie & Kole. I spent some 'mommy & Kole' time with him this morning snuggling on the couch while he drank his bottle. This day feels extra emotional for me because of all I have been through with this baby. I almost feel like its a birthday for both of us. Those 6 weeks I spent in the hospital really impacted my life and I so distinctly remember the feeling that I had one year ago today knowing that I was finally going to have this baby.

Allie made me a mother but Kole made me a better mother.

These were the first few days of Kole's life...

The first time I really got to hold him...

momma & Kole snuggling this morning.
I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH... HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABY!